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Local Kindercare Closes

By Nick F — Associated HNF News
Over time, this building has become faded and hidden from the public eye, who are interested in big flashing signs. The local Kindercare in our town has been closed for a while. When I interviewed a few people on the street, they had no idea about the building’s history.

“I didn’t even know we had a Kindercare,” stated one man.

Wielding my 9mm in my back pocket, I decided to go into the building. Non-surprisingly, the door was open. As soon as I walked in, I heard a high squeaky voice. “Attack!” it cried. Suddenly white grenades were thrown at me. I think they may’ve been gas bombs, since I noticed the extreme smell right before I passed out.

When I came to, I immediatly reached for my 9mm, but noticed it was gone. Holding it was a little kid, maybe 6, who was wearing a dirty shirt and smelled rancid. “Okay little boy, can I have my gun back?” I asked, hoping he wouldn’t make a fit about having the gun.

I wasn’t surprised when the kid said no, but when he took the gun out of safety, I got a tad frightened, I have to admit. “Little boy,” I pleaded. “Please put down the gun.”

That’s when I noticed my arms being tied together by another kid, a little girl. She may’ve been cute at one time, but her scowl gave me quite the opposite feeling. Things began to seem a bit too weird for me, so I asked, “What is going on?”

The boy didn’t get upset or mad, he said all too calm, “You are a prisoner of Ericsville”. The girl then chimed in, “He’s an outsider.” Pulling a map out his back pocket, the little boy explained this to me with the sense of a great military leader. “Look here,” he pointed at the map, which was near the entrance. “This is Ericsville. Over here is China, here is Smithson, and this is Daisyboro. Currently we are in a war with Smithson.” He pointed at a spot directly opposite of the entrance. “Due to the energy crisis, we have to rely on Smithson to get out energy from the generator. However, since we’ve been having a drought and have had to withhold water, they’ve withheld energy.”

I just became very confused, but I noted that the water heater was in this territory and the generator was in ‘Smithson’.

“Can I leave?” I asked, seeming a bit bored from this very odd story. I stood up, but then sat down when I saw the barrel of the gun pointed at me.

“You can’t leave. I’m sure you’ll just betray our secrets to Smithson now,” the boy said.

I denied such a horrendous accusation. “No,” I argued. “I don’t want to get in the way of your… …” I struggled to find a right word. Then I said, “Politics.” However, it didn’t sound right. Little children, war, energy crisis? Why couldn’t the children just go home? I didn’t ask this, for I feared some odd story that would’ve involved at least two ocelets.

“Put down the gun Eric,” said the little girl. “He’s loyal to us, aren’t you?” Such sweet and pacifistic words came out so forced and harsh, appearing to be a horrible accident with nature. Luckily, Eric, as his name would seem to be, did put down the gun. “I can leave now, can’t I?” I pleaded. At this point, I was literally begging on my knees.

Eric gave a grunt, but then sighed, “Sure, I suppose you can leave, as long as you go straight out the entrance, no where else.” I nodded frantically, since I had no other intentions. I stood up, reaching out my hand to collect my weapon, but Eric instead shook my hand. He seemed to have no interest in giving back my gun. At this moment though, I felt no need to bring up this discussion. After all, I had stepped into his land.

As I turned around to walk out, I heard a gun go off and my back felt like it was ripped open and splashed with salt water. I immediately fell to the ground in pain. After the initial stung, I realized it hit right below my left shoulder, meaning the shot wasn’t meant to kill me, but just to dissuade me from entering Smithson territory, assuming he had good aim. I have to assume he did though, for he said, “That’s just to dissuade you from entering Smithson Territory.”

I got up, and staggered to the door, giving a frown to Eric and the little girl, and then exited.

This is meant for everyone to know not to go into that place, even if you’re just investigated. I’m not sure what happened to the supervisors, but there could be countless children hiding in there from after the revolution. Anyway, they’re suffering major political issues that seem to be a microcosm of our planet right now. If we’re lucky, we won’t have anyone going into Earth just to investigate though.

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